Posted on April 25, 2025

Lakeville Woman Claims Large Fry was Mostly Air

40

Lakeville, Indiana — In a legal battle that has already gained traction on social media and in the aisles of the local Dollar General, Lakeville resident Heather Egger has filed a lawsuit against national fast-food chain Fry Station (name redacted pending corporate denial) after claiming her “large fry” was, quote, “90% air and broken dreams.”

According to the complaint, Egger purchased the fries last Tuesday around 3:17 p.m. from the Fry Station drive-thru on Michigan Street. She expected, in her words, “a golden mountain of crisp, seasoned joy.” What she got instead, she says, was “seven and a half fries, a whisper of salt, and enough empty cardboard to qualify as studio housing in Los Angeles.”

“I paid $4.29 for this,” Egger said at a hastily organized press conference outside her attorney’s office, flanked by a half-eaten burger and what appeared to be a printed-out screenshot of the restaurant’s menu board. “That’s sixty-one cents per fry. I’ve never felt more betrayed, and I used to date a magician.”

The moment of realization, she says, came just after she’d driven away. “I reached into the bag and thought the fries had tipped over. I checked the cup holder, under the burger wrapper, even behind the seat. Nothing. Just that limp cluster of sadness sitting in a box built for a feast.”

Egger’s legal representation, Arthur St. James of St. James & Provolone LLP, describes himself as a “consumer justice advocate and part-time food disappointment survivor.” He specializes in cases he refers to as “emotional food trauma,” which he says is more common than people think.

“This is not just about underfilled fries,” said St. James, whose tie bore a faint mustard stain. “This is about corporate manipulation. About the illusion of abundance. About containers designed to deceive the human eye and devastate the human heart.”

The lawsuit accuses the chain of gross misrepresentation and emotional distress, noting that the fry container was “designed with misleading proportions, appearing full when in fact containing fewer fried potatoes than an elementary school lunch tray.”

St. James says they are seeking modest damages: a full refund, 10 coupons for actual large fries (filled to the brim, not emotionally or spiritually, but physically), and an apology letter “written in ketchup, ideally on a napkin.”

In addition to monetary compensation, the suit demands that Fry Station acknowledge the emotional weight of fry-based betrayal and submit to a third-party fry-filling audit.

News of the lawsuit spread quickly, especially after Egger’s TikTok video recounting the incident went semi-viral under the hashtag #FriesBeforeLies. In the video, she holds up the nearly empty fry container and says, tearfully, “I just wanted something warm and reliable… and instead I got a box of sadness.”

By Thursday, a GoFundMe page titled “Justice for Heather’s Fries” had raised $47 and one free McChicken sandwich someone claimed they didn’t want. “We’re not just doing this for Heather,” read the description. “We’re doing this for everyone who’s ever opened a fast-food bag and felt the hollow ache of unmet expectations.”

Lakeville resident and part-time poet Darryl Benson posted a haiku in support:

Golden promises — Hidden in paper coffins — Where have the fries gone?

Other locals chimed in with similar experiences. “I got a ‘large’ once that was maybe ten fries and a crispy end piece,” said one woman on Facebook. “I thought maybe it was just me. But Heather is brave enough to stand up. She’s our Erin Brockovich — but greasier.”

The Fry Station chain has not issued a formal response, though an anonymous employee from the Lakeville location told reporters, “Look, it was slow. Maybe someone just grabbed the end of the batch. Or maybe the fry guy was stoned again. I’m not saying he was. I’m just saying he might have been listening to Pink Floyd and rethinking capitalism at the time.”

There are rumors the company’s legal team is drafting a limited-time promotional campaign in response, reportedly titled: “Now With Eight Whole Fries! While Supplies Last.” Marketing experts say it's unclear whether the campaign would be ironic, apologetic, or both.

Privately, several fast-food insiders admitted that containers are often designed to appear full with far less product than implied. “It’s about surface area and angles,” said one former franchise manager. “There’s a whole geometry of deception involved. You think you’re getting a bounty. What you’re really getting is disappointment disguised as depth.”

Legal scholars are split on whether the lawsuit has merit. Professor Leslie Kerns of IU South Bend’s School of Law says, “Technically, there’s no federal fry standard. But under state consumer protection laws, misrepresentation of quantity could be considered deceptive trade practice — especially if the packaging is intentionally misleading.”

Others are less optimistic. “It’s fries,” said attorney Ron DeWitt of Mishawaka. “The courts are already overwhelmed. No one’s sending a judge home early over starch-based grievances.”

Still, Egger and her team remain undeterred. “This is about accountability,” she said. “If they can get away with this, what’s next? Transparent tacos? Phantom nuggets? We have to draw the line somewhere.”

For her part, Egger has reportedly returned to cooking at home, citing “fry trust issues.” She’s also been fielding media requests, including a rumored interview with a regional podcast called Midwest Outrage Weekly.

When asked if she still eats at Fry Station, Egger paused. “I mean, yeah. The nuggets are fire. But I bring my own measuring cup now.”

At press time, she was spotted outside the Lakeville location again — this time holding a sign that read “FULL FRIES OR FULL LAWSUIT” and handing out pamphlets titled Know Your Portions.

Sources close to the case say the next step is mediation, during which Egger’s team will allegedly present evidence including photographic fry counts, container volume comparisons, and a heat map of local potato-related complaints.

Until then, the case of Egger v. Fry Station continues to sizzle — not just as a legal matter, but as a symbol of what happens when expectations meet cardboard and come up short.